Allow me to explain myself

I have a tat...jk

It makes no sense because it comes from no where, but in my mind it works just fine.  

The summer before leaving for college my best friend Cara and I were getting ready to leave for school.  She was going to be at the University of Oregon, and I was going to be at SMU.  We were nostalgic about all of our time together in high school, and were nervous not to have each other to rely on.  It is so much easier to have good friends than to go it alone.  Always having someone to back you up, or to cry to on the phone.  

Well Cara and I both got computers as our graduation gift, and sat on my back porch the night before I left for Texas.  We were curled up in blankets in the chilly Seattle evening with our laptops laughing hysterically.  We came up with the idea of making a screen name that we wouldn't give to anyone else, like a secret code that we needed to talk.  Half in tears, half laughing hysterically we came up with these names.  Hers was, youreacowjk, and mine ihaveatatjk.  Sure it doesn't really mean much to anyone else.  But to me it means sitting on the back porch with my best friend laughing, and ensuring that no matter what we were never too far apart.   

Word Association

okay lets play....

Socks...cat

Fish...jews

t-shirts...bagels

class...pass

Lamps...fart

make-up...balls

hazlenuts....sour

This is just a little trip inside of the mind of my friend Kelly Caldwell when we were up at three a.m. studying.  Funny things happen when you deprive yourself of sleep and pump yourself full of caffeine.  Are these thoughts buried in our minds all the time and they bubble out when we are too tired to filter.  Kelly says...I don't know probs.

styrofoam...asbestos

envelopes....stamps

secrets....giggle...sex

post...what?

drugs...mmmmm

ears....nibble

pens....tan

tattoos....ew

favorite....me?

cards....tard

gold...mold

tree....flowers

boats...t-pain

boys....yum

guitar....string

hats...warmth

spiders...ahhh!

grey....why?

nice....fake

vitamins....useless

publish....crush

rude....knee cap

apples....travel

gummy bears....haribo

ankles....cankles

water....love

bottle....baby

font....scary

elephants....loud

Julie and Julia

I followed the blog, I read the book, I saw it in theaters.

Now it's coming out on video. I swear these are happy tears!

There are certain people who touch the entire world with their charm. That have a magnetism that is undeniable. Julia Child was one of those people.

The movie Julie and Julia while it received moderate reviews from critics, left me in movie after glow for days. I felt I had found a kindred spirit, in a woman I had been watching on TV since my childhood was finally brought to me in a whole new light. I felt I could understand her. She was vulnerable, and yet so strong in her convictions.

She is an inspiration to all people who know exactly what they want for themselves but are too afraid to do it, in her words, "Find something you're passionate about and keep tremendously interested in it."

She was graceful, charming, poetic, and fearless. I would feel lucky to be like her.

Bon Appetit!

Sweet tea gone sour.

So there I am sitting at my little table drinking copious amounts of sweet tea to keep my up through the night writing my fifteen page paper, that I swear I had no other time to do other than the night before.

Its five a.m. and I'm feeling relatively good. I have 12 pages done and four hours to write the last three. I get up and talk to some of my friends that are leaving for the daily update, and tell them how optimistic I'm feeling. "Once I conclude and cite all my sources I'll be good!" I say.

Then it happened.

I sat back down to my computer and while reading my paper closely reach for my sweet tea and then. I can hardly say it. I dropped my cup onto my laptop.

curses

tears

yelling

hyperventilating

I propped that baby upside down on the couch and paper toweled it off as much as possible. I grabbed my hair dryer and pointed it into the keys. Then I prayed, then I slept next to it on the couch for two hours, staring blankly at that little piece of technology that means so much to me and to my future.

I thought to myself that at the end of the day no one will ask you about what you went through during school. No one will know that you worked diligently for hours on you paper just to see it sucked into cyber space in a flash. We are so reliant on technology, and yet technology has no regard for anything that goes on in our lives.

I am doing my best to abide by this wise saying...

Things that will surely ruin a good portrait shoot

There are some spoilers for portrait photography, that can make capturing the right 'moment' near impossible.  In this instance there were a lot of things that could have gone better, but these shots were definitely some of the worst.  

Antsy pets.  I assure you they don't understand why you are making them sit still for that picture.

Mothers who dress their children in short sleeve shirts just so that they match

Fighting siblings...that was not a nice hug.

40 degree weather

Too much sun

Annoying shadows

All in all sometimes the best pic is the one you just snap on the way back to the car, when you look down at the little girl, and say, "Hey pretty girl!"

Murray Street Coffee shop, the hunt continues

Despite the warnings from overly cautious friends not to go to Deep Ellum, I ventured out of our SMU brick bubble recently to check out Murray Street Coffee shop.  

I felt like I had stepped into Capitol Hill in Seattle.  Allow me to explain.  Good quality espresso+funky staff+cool art+interesting architecture+different music=Seattle.  Murray Street coffee shop is definitely all of that with a cool mix of people too.  There were moms, and business men, artists, and hippie/hipsters, all in one place!  Besides that the coffee was delicious, and they have lunch items, AND they serve booze.  Sounds like a perfect place to post up for studying starting with coffee and capping off with a cold beer. It was a great find I will definitely be going back.

I am left with this thought, what is it about certain places that attract chains, and other thats attract independent restaurants?  Dallas!  Why is it that you feel that chains are a sign of success??  Bigger is not always better!  Maybe I am a Seattle girl at heart, because when I start my restaurant there will be one and only one, and any improvements will be only to the original.

Best Idea Ever!

A: Omg everyone listen I have the best Idea ever! Okay so its the end of the semester, and we have been testing these students all year but lets just make sure that they know everything.

B: Everything??

A: Yes, everything if I said it the first week of class I want them to know it now three months later.  And I want this to be the largest portion of their grade.

B: But haven't you already tested them on all that?

A: Yes, but we need to make sure they know it all!  All of it!

B: Well should all of the teachers do this?

A: Yes!  And lets make them take all of the tests at the same time.  

B: But won't the students get tired and sick?

A: ...maybe, but if they do lets make it ruin their grade for the entire semester, and not let them make this up when they feel better.

B: But where will they study.  

A: In the library of course!  They will all gather together and study. 

B: Is it a good idea to put all of those slightly ill, extremely tired, and stressed out students all together? 

A: I don't know but lets do it anyway!

My name is Sarah and I am anti-Comic Sans

I have become a big fan of typography. I think it is interesting which font people will choose for different things. There was a long while where everyone thought it was really cute to make everything comic sans. Please.Stop.Torturing.Me.

Don't agree? Think fonts are just fonts?

Baby Shower

Still don't think so?

Baby Shower

Looks better doesn't it?

All I have to say is choose wisely, I will judge you. Fonts matter, they set the tone before the person reads the words.

Cosmo, the bible?

While home for Thanksgiving I ran into my brother's high school ex-girlfriend at the grocery store...awkward! It shouldn't have been seeing as they have both graduated form college now, but there is a particular reason why the break-up was so brutal.

They had been dating for two years, and things were getting serious. They went to college together, they had the same friends and were inseparable. This is when the chick breaks up with my brother because she said she took a quiz in COSMO that said their relationship was unhealthy.

I know blows your mind right? Why is it that people can be so stupid. I mean come on honey even if you did read it in Cosmo don't tell him you did! We have all read it, and the articles are spookily true. The thing that bothers me is that its all about manipulating guys to get what you want.

I read an article once titled, “make him fall in love with you.” I laughed at it but remembered the points, and decided to try it out when I went out with my friends that night. It said to wear something soft, whisper something in his ear, touch his arm when you talk to him, play with your hair a lot, and then point your head down, and look up at him when you are talking to him. That night, I wore a silky dress, and caught the eye of a guy I had met before. It was really loud so I talked right in his ear, and gave him a quick hug. He immediately asked if I wanted a drink, I tossed my hair back thinking how easy this was. I followed the other steps to a T, we danced, and left the bar holding hands and exchanging numbers.

The next day I woke up feeling terrible. It's nice to get attention from a guy but under what guise? I don't want to manipulate a guy into liking me, and I don't want to toy around with guys like that either. Boys are not playthings, and girls aren't silky hair flippers. What I mean to say is stop messing around. Cosmo is a magazine, people are people, with real feelings and emotions. If you like someone then tell them, and if you don't then tell them, but cut the crap. Stop hiding behind tricky manipulation and treat people with kindness.

I think that's stupid

I can't stand it when people say they are “finding themselves.” HELLO! You are right there!

It's a cliché and it's a trap. I don't understand people who skydive, or get a tattoo to define themselves. I have been told by more than one person that everyone needs to do these things, that it is life changing. As though people say if I go skydiving, then I will be myself. YOU ARE YOURSELF. Thinking that you need outside sources to be 'yourself' is a trap. You will constantly be looking to outside things to define yourself. Looking right past the only source you really need, your own mind.

Look in not out for yourself. If you have to look out for god's sake be more creative than going skydiving. I'm so over that.  

Dear Airlines:

This is my rant to you. While I can't complain too much because you allow me to see my family far more often than if I had to drive to Seattle, I can't help but get annoyed when I am on one of your lovely aircrafts.

Currently I am wedged into my seat, my knees are poking into the seat back...I am only 5'6” why is this. I am really thirsty, and that tiny cup of soda you gave me was a tease. I am resorting to chewing on ice as my only source of hydration, as I hate that VASA water they sell in the airport. I managed to sleep but only under the the conditions of me having gotten about six hours of sleep in the past two days. I refuse to lean the seat back and encroach on the poor person's space behind me because its just not worth the three inches. What? Online wifi?? Cool! I can do my homework! I checked for fees on your little gogo wifi information card but didn't find any! Amazing! But gogo wifi, you waited until my little L-top was alive with your signal to crush my dreams with your $12.95 charge for a mere few hours of service. Lame.

So what I mean to say airline is this. You are not very nice. You provide the bare minimum, charge way too much for it, and you don't even care. Rude. Oh, but thanks for the free Sky Mall magazine! I love looking at useless shit no one needs, its embarrassing that that stuff is even in production.

Sincerely,

FF

frustrated flyer.

Business Proposition

Pre-going-out pic

My birthday is on halloween. Which means two things; number one, halloween is my favorite holiday of the year, number two, I am allowed to dress up as a birthday cake and its not weird. This year being my 21^st I was absolutely prepared to pull out all the stops. I found a costume online that had a PINK SPARKLY cake skirt. I of course ordered it weeks in advance and left its rediculous foamy sparkly fabulousness out in my room for three weeks leading up to halloween to the nauseum of my roommates. Disappointed by the accessories that came with this costume I set out to find something better. I was telling one of my friends about my costume and she non chalantly said “you should put like candles on your head or something.” But I am not the kind of girl who is just going to stick some piddly little candles on my head and call it a day, no. I proceeded to craft the cutest non-cliche tiara, birthday head piece I have ever seen.

Ingredients:

Headband

Styrofoam

Two colors of felt

Pipe-cleaners or other decorations

Appropriately numbered birthday candles

Rhinestones

Really, really strong glue.

Directions:

I cut two circles out of the styrofoam blocks one a little smaller than the other. Then I covered them in felt and decorated them, and glued them together to look like a little cake. I attached them to a headband and allowed it to set for a couple of hours. Meanwhile I covered those little candles in glue and rhinestones and then glued them on top of the cake.

After completing this project and was about to head out for the night, I realized that I had just covered two CANDLES in FLAMABLE glue. Damn. Not willing to relinquish my sparkly accessory in the name of potential fire hazard I remained determined to remain coherent enough to make sure that no one successfully put fire to those little wicks. Well, turns out that if you set something out that strongly in your mind you will stick to it no matter how intoxicated you are. Crisis averted, I got tons of compliments, and am considering making them, and selling them online.

Funny things that happened on my 21^st:

1. We shot the neighbors with vodka water guns.

2. I got bitten by a vampire.

3. I lost all my friends, but they found me dancing on a stage

Cookbook, or autobiography?

Recently I was commissioned to take a woman's family recipes, and type them all up for a book. The woman was dying of cancer, and wanted her recipes to be preserved for her children. I can't imagine knowing that you are going to leave your family behind. Your mind buzzing with everything you wouldn't be able to do for them anymore. For Fern, it was her recipes. She had created them tweaking them into perfection for years, and wanted to know she would live on through them.

She gave me a ziploc bag full of scraps of paper and recipe cards. She knew that I would understand as I am a cook, and I did. I wanted her to know that it would be taken care of before she died. So I read each recipe, and I researched them on the internet to make sure I was getting them right. I attached the notes that were left on the bottom of the cards like, “Grandma and I made this for Easter, and Gary came back for thirds!” I spent hours organizing, and typing, and saved all of it. When I delivered it to Fern, a look of relief came over her face. She knew that even though she wouldn't be there for thanksgiving, her pumpkin pie would be, and that was enough.  

Hi there stranger!

Recently I found a website called omegle.  It is a chat site really different from any other that I have seen.  There are no profiles, no pictures, no signing up for anything, you just visit the website and start a chat.  The person you are talking to doesn't know who you are, and you don't know them either.  If you want to talk to someone else, you just disconnect, and start a new chat.  

I have visited the site a couple of times, in ultimate work procrastination.  Its kind of fun, and empowering at the same time.  Sure you run into some wierdos, but you talk to some cool people too from all over the world.  Knowing that they don't know you means you can say whatever you want, and be whoever you want.  There is a power in being anonymous, but what is it?

This one time I signed on and a guy wanted to get my msn and video chat.  First of all of course I said no.  Second, I was like oh you poor guy, why can you not find a girl in real life?  He told me about his life, and I talked him through it and told him that he just needed to get back out there.   He thanked me and we signed off.  Whether or not he actually cared what I was telling him I will never know, but I felt I had accomplished something.  A random connection, with a random person, who just needed a little encouragement.  

I think Omegle is a cool concept, if not just a really fun procrastination tool.

Check it out!

The Creepy Man in Blockbuster

I don't know if it's just an overactive imagination or what, but everywhere I go I make up stories about people's lives. For instance I was in blockbuster recently and made up this story about the people working there.

My name-tag says I'm Scott but my friends call me Scooter. I'm a jock, and I'm probably cooler than you. Why the hell are you renting Pinocchio for the seventeenth time for your kids. Here's a thought, buy the damn movie you've already spent $47 on rental fees, and late charges, after “your toddler hid it in their playhouse”, yeah yeah I don't really care so shut up. Just get your fake boobs out of my face lady. The only reason why I am here is to make enough money to keep taking Emma to the movies on Friday nights. She is a pain in the ass but I would do anything to sit with my arm around her and kiss her on her front porch.

“What the hell dude!” I yelled as someone was punching me in the arm. It's Christian, what a creepy asshole. “Relax man, go restock those movies,” he said. He says things like “man” thinking I will stop thinking that he is a creepy 23 year old asshole. "Well its not working," I think out loud. "What?" says Christian. I don't even reply I just take the annoying squeaky movie cart and wheel it out to the children's section, only because it is the farthest away from the cash register where Christian hovers.

I listen to him as a girl comes into rent a movie. She is alone, and I can tell that Christian wants to hit on her but is trying to work up the courage. She looks around forever, and finally makes it up to the counter. I hear him say, "You have the same name as a very beautiful irish playwright," and then look expectantly at her. She pauses awkwardly and then says thanks and leaves. Poor girl, didn't know what to say. But hahaha look at that crazy man standing deflated at his throne of movies. I don't think he has ever even been on a date.

I hope my kids are as funny as I was

As a little kid I had a very overactive imagination, and still do. Here is a short list of my weirdness.

1. My dream job was to be a pizza delivery girl on roller skates. I would draw pictures of my costume.

2. I made up a song and dance to a little tune I called “I'm feeling a little froggy.”

3. I didn't think that there were monsters under my bed, I thought there was a dancing garden gnome on my bed tickling my feet.

4. I made up a game that became a hit with all the neighborhood kids called “Milk the Cow” where we would soak a bunch of towels in water and hang them up on a tree branch, and squeeze the water into a bucket, and collect it it a big tub.

5. I used to catch crickets in dixie cups with my cousins and brother and then stick them in the freezer so we could save them for the morning. ...whoops?

6. Once when I had a high fever with the chicken pox I hallucinated that all my furniture was walking towards me to come and beat me.

7. I broke and dislocated my thumb playing moving target with my brother...I was the moving target.

8. Once, on a long road trip with my aunt we stopped an got some chips and drinks. My brother and I had the chips and my aunt kept reaching back for chips. My brother and I licked them before giving them to her because we wanted the chip seasoning. It took her a while to notice.

9. I insisted on being a ballerina cat for halloween at the age of five.

Funny Lullaby

The music that your parents listened to when you were little turns into your lullaby later in life no matter what it was. Everyone's parents listen to different music. It all brings back different memories. I for one grew up with a cowboy and a parrot head. My parents founded me on Jimmy Buffet, and George Strait. Nothing puts me at ease quicker than the song, “Little Miss Magic,” by Jimmy Buffet. It makes me think of summers in Wimberlee, where my family used to go stay on a ranch for a week, and hang out by the pool all week. That song makes me think of laying on my dad's chest and listening to his heartbeat as he sang that song to me.  

My brothers are the same way, our 'sleep' mixes on ipod are comprised of the same mix of classic country, and Jimmy ballads. What I have come to find, is that this is true for most people. There is something about being reminded of being a little kid, that is comforting.

Photographers must also be comedians.

I am not into this kind of photography...

It's over saturated, over exposes, and overdone!  The pouty face, the cold eyes.  I know this girl.  this is the opposite of her personality. It just feels like its trying too hard.

In my portraits I want their personality to shine.  Doesn't she look sincere?  Thats because she is!  See she is my friend and she was genuinely smiling because I had made her laugh.  

Which brings me to this idea that photographers have to be comedians to get good portraits. 

Because when you make them laugh you get faces like this. 

Or like this. 

Portrait photography without personality is just flat.  These shots are some of my favorites because they show exactly what they should.  Erin is simple and genuine, Holly is edgy, and Brittney is still a little kid inside.  

Dandelions

Because I was a weird child, I refused to make a wish on dandelions when I was a little kid.  Why?  Because my dad told me that Dandelions were weeds, at about the same time that we learned in my science class that some plants have built in ways to travel through the wind to spread their seed....like dandelions.  

I put two and two together and thought that by blowing on dandelions you are spreading weed seeds!  Then I imagined that the way that this idea of making a wish on these weed flowers was started by a creepy man who wanted to sneakily make all little children blow their wishes on weeds and spread them like wildfire.

Is that wierd?

"children!  Blow on the dandelions and all of your wishes will come true!"

"Okay creepy man whatever you say"

...and the rest was history

Mallory Nutt

I was flattered when my friend Mallory Nutt asked me to take her headshots for a play she was auditioning for.  Mallory and I talked about how it's so easy in college to lose sight of things that you love to do because we get so busy with school, and jobs, and activities.  Sometimes you have to fuel that other part of you that is not all about resumes and finding jobs.  Its okay to take pictures and be in plays for fun. That is what keeps us sane.  So I took pictures for Mallory, and Mallory used my photos for her play audition, and we were both better off for it. 

I am not afraid of heights, but I am afraid of Vampires.

Do you ever have fears that you know are ridiculous, but couldn't explain?  I have a few which I am sure are due to an over active imagination. 

1. The squirrels at SMU. 

Okay, seriously do you just walk under them scampering in the trees and not think what if they fell out and bit you like the attacking bunny in Monty Python??  No?  Well I do, and its terrifying!

2.  Vampires.

It all started with count Dracula in Sesame Street, a few bad dreams, and the rest is history.   To this day I sleep with the covers pulled tightly up to my neck because my little girl mind rationalized that if I covered my neck the vampires couldn't get me.  Now they're everywhere!  vampire shows, books, music.  I don't care if they are nice vampires, they still suck blood, and they are still terrifying.

3.  Cotton.

This is not really a fear so much as a pet peeve.  The worst is when you open a new medicine bottle and there is that super fluffy non-contained cotton, and you have to pull it out past the shards of aluminum that covered the top of the bottle.  I would go on but its too painful.  I refuse to even open them, thankfully I don't live alone so it isn't really a problem yet.  I shudder at the thought of having to do it alone.

The Curious Case of Bejamin Button

This weekend while visiting my grandparents, for fall break and recovering from illness, I watched "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" with my grandma.  The movie is about a boy that is born looking physically old and becomes younger with age.  The movie goes through Benjamin's whole life from his strange childhood being looked after by a woman who was a caretaker for an old folks home and took him in after he was abandoned on her doorstep.  

Being a hopeless romantic, I loved the magical story of Benjamin falling in love, and the chain of events that lead him away and then back to her.  The movie reminded me a lot of the movie, Forest Gump.  It had a narrator, the whole movie was a flashback, and told lots of mini stories.

Overall I thought that the movie was sweet, and worth watching, although really long.  The perfect movie to watch on a rainy day when you are a little under the weather.

Wait what?

I am writing a paper about Salmonella for my CF class, and discovered that Salmonella was discovered by a scientist named David E. Salmon.

Salmon

Salmonella

Salmon

Salmonella

Wait what?

Continuing the Quest, Shop 2: The Pearl Cup

The Pearl Cup is located on Henderson, I saw it mentioned in D Magazine as one of the best lattes in Dallas and figured it was worth a try.  
When I arrived my first impression was that it was a complete turnaround from The Crooked Tree.  With a mod cement floor, stainless steel sign, and sleek lined furniture The Pearl Cup was definitely a modern hangout.  This would be a great place to hang and study, with free wifi, caffeine, and chairs that weren't so comfy that they make you fall asleep, what more could you ask for??
The menu offered some light bites like hummus and pita, or paninis, as well as a full bakery case featuring coffee shop classics like black and white cookies.  I was mostly interested in the coffee though, so I went up to the barista and asked what the signature drink was.  He told me about their award winning Pearl Latte, and I was in.  I just wish I knew how he did it!  It was smooth and creamy with just the right touch of sweet.  

Verdict:  Best latte in Dallas hands down, cool hangout, not far from SMU.  I will definitely be coming back.

Stinky

Stinky is my little brother.  His real name is Will, I honestly don't know how this nickname came to be, bit for as long as he or I can remember I have called him stinky.  

I came to a terrifying realization recently as I was visiting my grandmothers house.  I have not seen my little brother since Christmas, but he was at my grandparent's house this summer and she measured him on the door where we have all been measured since 1990.   When I last saw my Stinky he was at least and inch or two shorter than me.  When I looked at the door I saw to my horror that he was THREE inches taller than me.  THREE.  Are you doing the math here?  That means that in less than a year he has grown FOUR inches.  FOUR.  

My whole little family is growing up.  It's happening fast.  Really fast.  I have to get used to it whether I like it or not.  

This picture is my favorite picture of him I have ever taken.  He is a ham, but I caught him before he knew I had the camera out.  This is the way I know him, love him and miss him.

The Crooked Tree, Shop One in the Search for the Perfect Coffee House

Part photography project, part Seattle girl looking for good coffee, I decided that I was no longer satisfied with the overly roasty flavors of Starbucks, or the watered down beverages at java city.  I listened to the buss around campus and heard more than one person talking about The Crooked Tree.  
The Crooked Tree is in Uptown, right off of McKinney on Routh.  Right in the middle of a residential street, this house-gone-coffee shop blends right into the quaint Uptown neighborhood.  When I walked in the place was full of funky artwork, students on their MacBooks, and eclectic antique furniture.  I walked up to the barista and asked what their signature drink was.  She told me about their Dolce Inverno, which was vanilla soymilk steeped in earl grey tea and then steamed with a couple pumps of vanilla syrup.  Sure, it wasn't coffee but it sounded good.  

I walked around and took pictures while the barista made my drink.  I recognized a few people from SMU there, so maybe its not the best place to hide out to do homework.  Overall, the atmosphere was comfortable, the prices were fair, and my drink was delicious, I will definitely be going back.

Home is Where Your House is

Moving is somewhat of a curse word in some homes. In mine it’s a way of life. My parents grew up moving, their parents grew up moving, and I was raised the same way. To never feel connected to places, but rather to people. 
Texas, California, Singapore, Australia, Boston, Washington, the story of my life. There are people all over the world who have moved far more than I have. I know, some of them are my best friends. It seems that something dies inside when you have to leave people that many times; when you are forced to become a part of a community where no one knows who you are. I've seen it happen, from distance, of course. I have told friends many times that life is all about perspective. Do you see an opportunity or a horrible situation? I saw an opportunity. 

My life has been one of fresh starts, world travel, and the constant promise of uncertainty. Knowing that I would live in one place for four years initially made me feel trapped. In my community high school students tended to have a lot of connections based on the fact that they lived there their entire lives. I, on the other hand, didn’t know anyone; I knew I would never have a history in a community. My pre-school teacher would never become my employer; my teachers would never have known…anyone in my family. I had two options: one, give up; two, learn to self-advocate at the age of 14. I became immersed in the community, making connections whenever possible. I volunteered my baby-sitting services to the moms of the other boys on my little brother’s baseball team. I donated cakes to local auctions. I volunteered for anything that caught my interest. It didn’t take long at all before I no longer had to seek opportunities. Soon I was being requested to volunteer at functions to raise money for a local restaurant that caters to the homeless community; I was invited to attend a mission trip to Tijuana; I was asked to be the photo editor of the yearbook by a teacher who is notorious for not even knowing her students names. 
I realized then that simply living in one place doesn’t really entitle a person to anything, and neither does knowing a lot of people. Only after earning respect does one gain success. 

I have a clear bias that moving is a way of life that forces a person to be a self-advocate. It forces families to stick together, in the periods of time when you are all each other have. As well as causing you to realize that the connections you make with others are really all that you leave behind. 

What I wonder is what it is like to live in one place your whole life? Does it create a feeling of freedom in knowing what to expect from your life? Or might a person feel trapped by the expectations of the community that raised them?

Georgie

Georgie is my big brother.  He is about three years older than me, a foot taller than me, and I used to make fun of him for not going on the big roller coasters with me because he was scared.  Now he is an Airborne Ranger, and second Lieutenant in the Army, and I am VP education for Alpha Chi Omega.  The tables have turned.  

I was the crazy one when we were little kids.  I was always performing for the family, and making up weird games, even warding off neighborhood bullies.  Then somehow we were all grown up and I was standing on the sidelines with my mom watching him jump out of a blackhawk helicopter at his Airborne Ranger graduation.  

Georgie may be refferred to as Lieutenant Kane now.  He may be off in foreign countries in situations I can't imagine.  But to me, he will always be my Georgie. 

Little Drew

I am just one of those people who has to take care of everyone.  There I said it.  I accept it, and I'm not ashamed. 

I started baby-sitting at a very young age mostly because my little brother is seven years younger than me, and I learned very quickly how to take care of a baby.  By the age of thirteen I was baby-sitting for multiple families, and to the glorious point when your have more than one job and can say no to the family with the stinky children.  

But there is a magical moment in every babysitters career, when you meet your regulars.  For me it was in high school, I was fifteen, and met them at my little brother's baseball game.  

From the first time I baby-sat for the Smith's I knew that they would be my regulars.  I played with them got them to bed on time, and had the house put back together before the parents got home, and complimented me profusely, boosting my fifteen year old ego.  

 I baby-sat for the Smith's every couple weeks all through high school, and became quite attached.  I found that I would look forward to seeing them, and they would look forward to me baby-sitting as well.  I saw a turning point suddenly when I realized that I was the only babysitter that the Smith's would allow.  The youngest child, Drew, would have a meltdown around anyone else.  I had been around the Smith's so much that I hadn't noticed how the way I talked to Drew hadn't changed in the four years I had been babysitting for them.  I assumed that the way he would go from being fine, to inconsolable at the snap of your fingers.  I didn't notice until I baby-sat another little girl that was the same age as Drew, and halfway through our game of veggie tales and fairies go to the candy store it hit me that this little girl was speaking in full elaborate sentences far beyond Drew's vocabulary.  

This is exactly at this moment that the awkwardness of being a babysitter sets in.  You are attached to these kids, and they are attached to you, but you are an employed caretaker. You are not a parent, and have no authority in the way that they are to be raised.  So what do you do when you realize that there is something wrong with a child you are babysitting?   Especially when you suspect something as life changing as autism.  

I did some research.  I did a lot of thinking.  I decided that I couldn't let it go, and I had to have a talk with Mr. and Mrs. Smith.  I was nervous when I arrived at the house that day.  But to my relief, Mrs. Smith ushered me in and told me where they would be going as usual and then broke the news about Drew.

She had been taking him to a speech therapist, who told Mrs. Smith that Drew had no issues speaking, he had issues communicating, because he was autistic.

While I was relieved that I didn't have to say it myself. The whole situation left me thinking. As a babysitter you are invited into someone's home to take care of their children. They trust you to keep their children safe, until they return. But does it go beyond that? Is it my place as a babysitter to alert the parents of sensitive health issues I recognize? Or inappropriate behavior the kids have exhibited?  Or do we just stay out of it and make sure they get to bed on time

Game Day as I see it...

Make cupcakes not war!

Cupcake shoes!
Cupcake backpacks!
Cupcake jewelry!
Giant cupcakes!
Cupcake weddings!
Cupcake clothes!
cupcake perfume!
Baby cupcake beanies!
Cupcake band-aids!
Cupcake tats!

It all started about five years ago.  I had my first internship at one of the many cupcake bakeries cropping up all over the country at the age of fifteen.  Within a year that bakery I worked at expanded to three stores and all were packed with customers.  Different magazines came every weekend to write articles about cupcake weddings, or "The best cupcake in Seattle."  

Now I work at a new bakery that features cupcakes everyday, trying to get their piece of the cupcake craze.  What I wonder, is how much longer is this cupcake stuff going to last?  It's everywhere!  People are eating cupcakes, wearing cupcakes, even tatting themselves with cupcakes!  This food trend has lasted for five years, at some point are people going to get tired of it?  And if they do, what's next! This has been on my mind recently as one of my dreams is to own a bakery of my own, and I would love to hop on the next food trend wagon.  Only time will tell what comes next!

Just for fun, this cupcake related clip always cracks me up.