Moving is somewhat of a curse word in some homes. In mine it’s a way of life. My parents grew up moving, their parents grew up moving, and I was raised the same way. To never feel connected to places, but rather to people.
Texas, California, Singapore, Australia, Boston, Washington, the story of my life. There are people all over the world who have moved far more than I have. I know, some of them are my best friends. It seems that something dies inside when you have to leave people that many times; when you are forced to become a part of a community where no one knows who you are. I've seen it happen, from distance, of course. I have told friends many times that life is all about perspective. Do you see an opportunity or a horrible situation? I saw an opportunity.
My life has been one of fresh starts, world travel, and the constant promise of uncertainty. Knowing that I would live in one place for four years initially made me feel trapped. In my community high school students tended to have a lot of connections based on the fact that they lived there their entire lives. I, on the other hand, didn’t know anyone; I knew I would never have a history in a community. My pre-school teacher would never become my employer; my teachers would never have known…anyone in my family. I had two options: one, give up; two, learn to self-advocate at the age of 14. I became immersed in the community, making connections whenever possible. I volunteered my baby-sitting services to the moms of the other boys on my little brother’s baseball team. I donated cakes to local auctions. I volunteered for anything that caught my interest. It didn’t take long at all before I no longer had to seek opportunities. Soon I was being requested to volunteer at functions to raise money for a local restaurant that caters to the homeless community; I was invited to attend a mission trip to Tijuana; I was asked to be the photo editor of the yearbook by a teacher who is notorious for not even knowing her students names.
I realized then that simply living in one place doesn’t really entitle a person to anything, and neither does knowing a lot of people. Only after earning respect does one gain success.
I have a clear bias that moving is a way of life that forces a person to be a self-advocate. It forces families to stick together, in the periods of time when you are all each other have. As well as causing you to realize that the connections you make with others are really all that you leave behind.
What I wonder is what it is like to live in one place your whole life? Does it create a feeling of freedom in knowing what to expect from your life? Or might a person feel trapped by the expectations of the community that raised them?
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